3 Daughters

Actually there is a husband we've been married 27 years, problem is he doesn't like to upset his girls....2nd this divorce of my middle daughter has been hard on all of us...her husband was phyically and verbally abusive.  So it's hard on my husband not being able to act on his feelings towards the ex-husband....he is also the type of father that sees nothing his girls do wrong...and doesn't like confrontation.

My husband and I did talk, he said he realises how much it upsets me when my daughters make remarks, he sayes but you know they don't mean what they say and that we both need time to cool down.  He said we are to much alike...but he says he knows when I'm upset I shut down and don't want to talk so he feels leave me alone for a day or two then talk....he's probally correct on that part...He's a good husband he can tell when I'm upset he's answer is to just hold me and give me time.    I waited a few days then talk to my daughter and told her I knew this was hard on her as well as everyone in the family....and that I love her, her husband and daughter with all my heart.  But sometimes she needs to realize that she should think about what she sayes before she sayes it.   She will always say mom I was just upset...I didn't mean what I said...I told her weather you mean it or not...it still hurts.   She said I do want to support my sister but I just get fustrated that I feel like she doesn't listen.  I explained trust me I know I have a little sister the same way...and I'm still helping her...you will most likely have to do the same for your sister as well.    I know she loves her sisters...it's one of those cases I can say what I want about my sister, but no one else better.

Thank you for your help and advise...it was just good talking to someone about

I have never favored one child over another. I am there for all three of my children my oldest 25, middle child is 23(going thru a very bad and abusive divorce) and my youngest who has to go thru so much with her 2 oldest sisters she is only 14. My oldest is loved very much and gets a lot of attention her and I actually are in business together as realtor's. When my oldest was going thru a bad period in time I was there for her as well....now unforuntally it is her sister that is dealing with crap now. We are a very close family...but the issue that her sister is going thru has hurt this entire family no one really knows how to handle things because we have never had to go thru someone abusing one of our family members...the other thing is I think my oldest is going thru that she feels like she should be able to protect her sister and cant. My oldest has always been the one that has more or less rescued her sister...from toddler to present. My middle daughter has always been the weaker of the 3 and it's hard for all of us to see what she going thru and feel like our hands are tied. Domestic Abuse on your child and sibling is a very hard thing to handle. Thank you for your advise.